i've been living for 19 years now n i dont know abt who's my true friend..

sometimes i think abt a person and feel like they're my true friend..

but not long after that i start to doubt that..

many things made me so doubtful abt it..

moreover at my bday..

at my latest bday even she who i thought is my best friend didnt congratulate me..

i dont know if she really forget my bday or she thought that congratulation isnt important anymore..

my close friend now just know my bday frm FB..

most of them forget n just remember cz there's people congratulate me..

even my mom forget my bday n only remembered at night but she remind me if i already congratulate my sis's bday..

the one who congratulate my first is someone who i dont think would do that..

i dont know if she was just not sleeping at that dawn n she saw my bday at FB, i dont know..

but on top of that, i dont wanna think much abt it anymore..

i will just called who i think are my true friends..

i wont mind if they think the same abt me or not..

cz i think true friends wont mind abt it..

but if i dont feel that they think the same abt me so my deed for them will be limited to what i think is enough..

my true friends ??

who ??

them ??

are they really my true friends ??

this life doesnt insurance us with anything..

it doesnt promise us with happiness all the time..

it doesnt promise us that our life would always going smoothly..

it doesnt promise us that we will always meet good people..

it doesnt promise us that our deed will be paid the same..

it also doesnt promise us abt when we will find our true friends or even our mate..

we ourselves who can guarantee how our life will be going till the end..

boyfriend or boy friend ??

18 years old.

never be in a relationship.

this mate issue always make me a lil bit 'galau' ( thats indonesian terms for something like uneasy feeling ).

when i ever close to hv a boyfriend then everything being ruined.

i hv many boy friends but no boyfriend.

how this can be ??

sometimes i think theres something wrong with me.

but then i realize that some of my friend never be in a relationship also.

so im not the only poor one.

but to be honest i wanna hv one.

oya about two days ago my mom tell me her conversation with one of her friend when they made a phone call.

my mom said that her friend hv an acquaintance.

he's 28 years old n he likes tiny girls.

isnt it weird that he only wants to be with tiny girls ??

but thats relief me cz that made me know that there must be someone who still like a tiny girl like me.

LOL

and as i am a tiny girl so she remember about me n intend to match me with him.

firstly, im just laughing.

dont u imagine 18 with 28 ??

oh nooo.

when he already wants to get married, im sure i still want to find a job.

then my mom said that she doesnt want to force me.

i will find my mate in time.

so i think, ' ok, mom. i trust u, n this mate issue wont worry me anymore.'

mom's words do relief me.

xoxo winidepu